Waiting.

I'm sick of waiting. 

Let me explain that...

Last night three of my best friends saw each other for the first time in three months.  Needless to say, it was necessary.  It was late, and we were laying on our beds with all the lights off.  You know how it is, when you can't see each other's faces deep conversations naturally arouse.  This was no exception.  We were all sharing about our summers. Not just what we'd been up to (we knew all that), but the really important stuff- the stuff that you can only share with your best friends.  

When it came to be my turn to share it got quiet. 

Very quiet. 

We all knew what was coming.

 And I hate being that person.  

But when I try to act like I have it together all the time, eventually I burst.  And who better to let the water flow than with your best friends?
            We all cried.  
And it wasn't just too much estrogen, either.  

The Spirit was moving. 

A thought one of them shared last night I never want to forget:

When we were younger, we used to think of summer as forever, and school just as something that we had to get done so that we could start living our "real life" again.  Once June came around each year, we could go back to that "normal life." But as we get older, we realized that school is our "normal life." It is most of the year, after all. Summer is simply a break from our normal lives.  it's the same way now with life.  We think of problems going on in our life as things that must go away before  we can go back to living a normal life.  But we have it all wrong.  The crap is our normal life.  Sometimes we get a break.  One day this will change.  We will no longer have crappy lives.  When we are in heaven, earth will be like a dream- not something that ever actually happened- kind of like school feels during the summer.  But we'll never have to go back.  School will be out forever. 

I don't know if this explanation makes sense to anyone else but me, and I think I'm okay with that. 


And so I say it agin: I'm sick of waiting.  


This nonsensical waiting seams so... wasteful. Is this all there is? Really? There's got to be more. But I thought that's where God usually came in.  


But what about for me, as a believer in Christ? Is this all there is for me? And I know it's probably a sin to think like that. But honestly- are we just waiting around until we can be in His presence? What's the point? 
I know, I'm being selfish. But when will all of it end?